Since you all seem to like to write poems
The next contest is one you will own
We will give a $10 Amazon gift card
To the one that works hard
To make us all laugh and groan
*Contest ends June 28th
*Multiple Submissions are ok
*Poem to be about TotallyFreeCrap
*All submissions to be a comment on this post
June 19th, 2008
June 19th, 2008 - 10:05 am
I’d like to write you a rap,
About your cool free crap.
But it’s only been 4 weeks since we met,
And I ain’t got nothing yet.
I’m sure my mail box will soon over flow,
With gifts from companies I don’t need to know.
Your fans leave comments for me to read,
And I start to wonder are these things I really need?
But I wait with anticipation to see what the first product will be,
we just can’t help ourselves when we see the word “free”!
June 19th, 2008 - 11:08 am
Roses are red
the grass is green
my oven push-puller is very keen!
June 19th, 2008 - 11:39 am
Deverie, now that is excellent ! I hope you win…
June 19th, 2008 - 1:06 pm
we’re told as a child
that nothing is free,
you get what you pay for
you must pay the fee.
something for nothing
we know isn’t right
so how come it happens
on TotallyFreeCrap’s website?
June 19th, 2008 - 1:27 pm
I love free crap, I cannot lie.
Even if I don’t need it, I’ll give it a try.
I’m so glad I found this website,
I think about free crap day and night.
Some call me frugal some call me greedy,
I’ll take anything free even tho I’m not needy.
Posters, balloons or fingernail shapers,
If it were free I’d take free strips of paper.
June 19th, 2008 - 4:58 pm
Walmart always delivers
on their offers no trap
Wish I could say the same
about the rest on TotallyFreeCrap
June 19th, 2008 - 5:38 pm
totally free crap
filling my mail box daily
glee for free for me
June 19th, 2008 - 6:12 pm
The best site, (between you and me)
is one with CRAP that’s TOTALLY FREE!
It’s such a big fun shopping spree,
with tons of food (mostly) sugar free.
There is never any guarantee,
still waiting for my chimpanzee!
AND where’s my cherries jubilee?my
potpourri and Chef Boy Ar Dee? my
Pedigree and fricasee and dont forget
my BLT?!
I will always be a devotee
a #1 fan in the first degree.
Totally Free Crap is my cup of tea, and its all so
worry free!
This is not some crazy con,
I want to win from Amazon!
June 19th, 2008 - 7:18 pm
wow there’s some real talent in this free crap site…who knew ?
June 19th, 2008 - 9:30 pm
I find myself having much fun
Whenever I see the mail has run
I fleed to the box in hopes I find
Totally free crap for me to pass some time
Oh, but alas, how sad, oh woe is me
But how the postman hates my mail delivery
June 19th, 2008 - 9:56 pm
Totallyfreecrap?!
Man, what’s up with that?
One of my friends asked me today.
As you can see,
Everything I get is free,
Which is why I’m always shouting hooray!
An empty mailbox stinks,
that is for certain, and everyone thinks
the only way to solve it is with letters.
But, alas I have found
a resolution so sound…
Why yes, it’s free crap, so it’s better!
You never know when that free
sample of lotion might be
what you’re looking for in your purse.
Plus, without all the free stuff
life would be so rough….
No samples in life, what could be worse??
June 19th, 2008 - 11:50 pm
It’s been about 11 months now,
Since I stumbled on this site.
Started signing up for crap…..
Never slept that night
The next day when my boss called,
To ask where I could be?
Told him he could shove that job,
Who needs money when stuff is free!!
I filled out forms both day and night,
And checked my mail each day,
Razors, lotions, cereal…
Even OIL OF OLAY!
Now some may say I’m addicted,
And some think I’m a freak.
But they don’t get the joy of FREEBIES,
Every day of the week!
I must issue out a warning though,
Even though getting crap’s a thrill.
You may end up sitting in the dark,
Cause it won’t pay your electric bill!
I’m at the end of my poem,
But here’s some advice from me,
Before getting addicted to free stuff,
Buy a computer with a battery!
June 19th, 2008 - 11:54 pm
you guys have really come up with some pretty cool tunes
i’m a little poetic but not even gonna bother, you guys have it covered already lol. <3
June 20th, 2008 - 12:10 am
a haiku
totally free crap
is a treasure chest of shit
wait four to eight weeks
June 20th, 2008 - 12:13 am
Wahooo!
Free stuff on the way!
I wonder what will be waiting today?
Is it the Dove or Cheerios?
Maybe the Post-It notes to share with my love?
Is it the Body Odor Spray?
You know that helps to keep the stink away!
Oh, who cares, whatever it is, it is the Free crap for ME!
So give it a cheer, ’cause there ain’t much freebies out here.
F…R…E…E! F…R…E…E! F…R…E…E!
TOTALLY FREE CRAP JUST FOR ME!
June 20th, 2008 - 12:36 am
Free stuff, free stuff
What will it be?
Coming to my mailbox I can not wait to see!
Very carefully I have filled out each form with care
Now I wait at the box twirling my hair
I love the idea, FREE FOR ME!
Just fill out the form and like magic there’s a delivery.
Here is my name…
Yes…this is my age…
Click on the right gender…
SUBMIT this for thee
TOTALLY FREE CRAP is alright by me!
Still, I am here
awaiting the day
when my free crap will be delivered
without any delay.
From spray for my odors to notes to inform lovers
that free crap is here and I am off ordering for others
…yes I continue to play this silly game
like lottery for poor men
awaiting the totally free stuff on a shiny new day!
June 20th, 2008 - 9:11 am
come on sylvia, write a poem, we would all love to hear it!
June 21st, 2008 - 8:02 pm
many forms filled out
often nothing comes to me
sometimes free crap does
June 21st, 2008 - 10:14 pm
I check my mail everyday
to see if I will get my free crap
when I get my free crap
it feels like my birthday
June 21st, 2008 - 10:21 pm
joe blow we want a poem from YOU!
June 21st, 2008 - 11:02 pm
my vote is for glo… a poem in true haiku fashion!
June 21st, 2008 - 11:12 pm
Here I go filling in my name to get a free sample that I hope Isn’t lame. I wait each day for the mail like some, for totally free crap that doesn’t always come. But yet I will fill my name in again because when I do get my freebie it is so much fun.
June 22nd, 2008 - 12:46 pm
It’s quarter past twelve, the mail lady is late
Doesn’t she know my free crap can’t wait?
I’ve filled out the forms until my keyboard is shot,
my dishes are dirty, Oh look! a free box of Dots!
Where was I, have I eaten, where’s the dog,
(was that a dog on my lap?)
There’s the mail lady! May she keep
the bills and leaves my Free Crap!
June 22nd, 2008 - 7:06 pm
(Sung with the Brady Bunch theme)
Here’s the story,
Of a place called Free Crap,
Who giving all kinds of free crap away,
All of it came in the mail,
Like the website offer said,
Who knows…if it’ll come today.
Here’s the story,
Of a man(?) named b-bomb
Who was busy on Totallyfreecrap.com,
Giving recaps on this free crap,
Making us ‘crapers feel together, but we were on our own-.
Till the one day, when the free crap started to arrive,
and I knew this site wasn’t full of jive, I had a hunch,
That this group,
Must somehow form a family,
That’s the way we all became the Free Crap Bunch
The Free Crap Bunch-the free Crap Bunch
That’s the way- we became the Free Crap Bunch.
June 22nd, 2008 - 9:22 pm
a haiku:
Mailman is happy
His truck chock full of Free Crap
Coming to my house
June 22nd, 2008 - 11:46 pm
Here goes…
June 22nd, 2008 - 11:47 pm
Totally Free Crap
Can it really be?
Can someone just give away crap
With no fee?
It’s a question I asked myself
Before my first time
I skeptically filled out my form
Every line
Then I waited, and waited
And waited some more
And can you believe it
It arrived at my door
I don’t know what it was
That just doesn’t matter
It was Totally Free Crap
I was mad as a hatter
Now, there’s crap to my left
And crap to my right
There’s crap in my basement
And up every flight
The crap’s overflowing
It’s sad, but it’s true
And this kind you can’t mop
Or wipe off your shoe
It’s hidden in corners
On counters, and shelves
It just keeps appearing
As if brought in by elves
My closets are bursting
My bedroom’s a mess
I have to stop ordering
Or, at least order less
But how can I pass up
A free whats-a-whosit
I just know that someday
I will need to use it
You see it’s a sickness
For which there’s no cure
I have so much crap
And I must order more
My four kids can’t walk here
But free soap keeps them clean
Their toys sport free stickers
And they feast on free beans
So, each day I get new crap
And it’s all thanks to you
I’m addicted to Totally Free Crap
I’m a crap addict — It‘s True!
June 23rd, 2008 - 2:27 am
I love the free things in life but not the problems it brings.
all you receive are broken promises and fake diamond rings…
I find my self waiting for your meaningless reply ,
and try not to let myself think of you or I will probably cry …
I check my mail box day and night , picturing your arrival love at first sight..
But once again you let me down , i sit and wait but there is no sound..
The mailman dodges as I come around , Treats me like a common hound,
the truth is I dont know why i wait for you, when time passes a month or maybe two…
I know one day Ill get you soon, I re-submited my free stuff entry at like noon…
please let my free stuff come soon….sit and wait is all I do..
June 23rd, 2008 - 10:51 am
PROPS to nancy using my name in her poem.
Geeez sandy, what an epic poem!
June 23rd, 2008 - 1:54 pm
There once was a website for free crap
Its purpose was to disburse crap for free, chap
Allow six weeks to receive
and years to conceive
of why sane folks get such joy from their free crap
June 24th, 2008 - 12:19 am
one more:
As I filled my iGoogle gadget with pictures of the sea,
I happened upon a site called TFC
What the hell is this I said to my self?
Free spices, hats, candy and more?
This can’t be. Nothing is free.
The free crap is real, its coming in!
Kids, fill out the forms and hit submit
Its freeeee crap and its all legit!
June 24th, 2008 - 11:03 am
Free Crap Rap
It’s the free crap rap,
Some may call it a game.
Yes, it’s the free crap rap,
All the other sites are lame.
It becomes so darn addicting,
it becomes your ball and chain.
Yes, it’s the free crap rap,
When you play it you win.
Yes, it’s the free crap rap
Some even call it a sin.
Yes, it’s the free crap rap,
Ask for it by name,
Free Crap Rap it will drive you insane.
Totally
June 24th, 2008 - 1:37 pm
sung to the tune of “The Addams Family Theme”
I want to get the free card.
It really shouldn’t be hard.
I’m surely not a retard.
It’s TotallyFreeCrap.
Though Amazon is online,
that card is gonna be mine.
If it isn’t, then I will whine.
It’s TotallyFreeCrap.
da-da-da-da
da-da-da-da
da-da-da-da
da-da-da-da
da-da-da-da
Now I can hear you singing
so, phone, come on a-ringing,
and tell me that I’m winning
from TotallyFreeCrap.
June 25th, 2008 - 8:39 am
WOW Diane! you win hands down!
June 25th, 2008 - 5:24 pm
:Bsmooth enters room of applauding spectators after his intro….they sit as he steps to the mic….:
“It is almost irrelavent…what the item appears to be
So long as I get it…absolutely free
Visiting the site is what I do…on the regular and I’m not trippin’
Can’t fight the allure of get crap free…especially when you pay the shippin’
What is it about free…it is a mystery to me
It must be society and a reflection of the economy
Regardless of the item…regardless of my day
I’ll contiinue to frequent Totally Free Crap as long as I don’t have to pay…
: Crowd ERUPTS with cheers and applause and snapping fingers:
BSmooth: thank you…thank you….you’re very kind…….
June 26th, 2008 - 6:56 pm
I really can’t rhyme
but I ain’t got a dime
so please please give me the card
and I’ll have you over for a bar-b-que in my backyard
Apologies to the bard!
June 27th, 2008 - 8:09 am
Totally free crap
Excuse me while I take a nap
I will dream about the card falling in my lap
cause my poem is the best on the map
and that’s a rap!
June 27th, 2008 - 11:18 am
I’m so happy I got my first free crap!
Instant, cheesy, hamburger mac!
I put it right in the cupboard,
who knows if it will ever be my snack…
June 27th, 2008 - 11:59 pm
Click on a website
And I so very much want
Totally free crap